Sunday, November 20, 2011

Thanksgiving Reflections

Seriously...does it ever slow down? I am really struggling with the fact that my time seems to vanish before my eyes. I looked down and suddenly I am a mom of 3 (almost 4) and my oldest is 6 years old only 12 years from departing the nest. We are 1/3 of the way through nurturing her through her childhood. Cries for milk have changed into cries of injustice and soon there will be tears of heartbreak and teenage anguish. I am so not ready for this.

My life is over complicated. I am working on simplifying it. I want to be able to spend intentional time with my children...the over-used "quality time" idea. The problem is that my attention span is startlingly short. If I were a child today I would probably be diagnosed with ADD. As it is I am an adult with real responsibilities dealing with the fact that I need to focus and be patient. I desire to be a good wife and a good mother. The question is...what do these things REALLY look like? I'm not talking about a June Cleaver kind of concept but a realistic "good" wife and mom that years from now my children will never doubt for one second that I love them with all that I am for who they are? Nope. I don't have any answers yet? I just hope I am not running up the therapy bill for my offspring years from now while I sort this dilemma out.

We are preparing for Thanksgiving. My in-laws are coming in to town and it is just as exciting as waiting for Christmas morning when I was a kid. I have one of those weird families where I genuinely love and enjoy my in-laws. They are just fun to be around and lets face it...I'm lonely. My children are great company but they lack the maturity to get most of my jokes and I am quite glad about that. I enjoy watching them interact with my children and watch them define "grandparent" in their young minds. I can only remember having one grandparent when I was growing up and that relationship was pure and precious to me. I see the same types of relationships growing between my children and my-laws and my mom. Maybe I am getting old and sentimental around the holidays. Or maybe, just maybe, God opens my eyes and lets me glimpse at what life is really about every once in a while.

My mom is spending Thanksgiving in Israel. It has been on her bucket list for years. I am excited to hear all about her trip when she returns. I never realize how much I talk to my mom until she is out of the country and unable to talk (well...ok...I'm too cheap to talk to her when she is out of the country). I guess this is an eye opening glimpse into the reality of life and the true richness of relationship.

I guess my epiphany for today is RELATIONSHIP and the value that lies there. What a cliche. I guess even cliches have to be rooted in truth right?

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