“If only I were (or I had) ______________________, I would ____________________.”
We have around 4 inches of snow on the ground and my Clever Container orders had come in. It was not the best day in the world to be delivering bags of goodies to my friends but if it were me I would want to have something new on my doorstep to play with on this less than ideal spring day. So, off I went with two of my four kids.
I made a delivery at 6 houses and I noticed that each house had their driveway shoveled out and a neat little path to their door. I was ever so thankful. When I cam home I looked at my still snow covered driveway, my indiscernible walkway, and my ice rink of a doorstep and I knew the dirty deed had to be done.
I gave my kids lunch and put them down for their naps. As I was “suiting up” to go outside and shovel it occurred to me that I didn’t have gloves, or a scarf, a hat, or snow boots. I put my husband’s gloves on, decided I would pass on the gloves and hat, and just went out in my tennis shoes. In the garage I pilfered around for a snow shovel before it dawned on me that my husband told me that our shovel was broken and it has been discarded. I sighed and found a large dirt shovel and opened the garage door.
I went through all of the stages of grief as I began shoveling. First I was in denial “it’s not that much snow, it won’t be too bad”. Then it was anger “my husband said he always wanted to live in a place with lots of land and I can’t even talk him into shoveling our driveway!” The sorrow and self pity came afterward, “I’m the only wife on my block that has to shovel her driveway, poor me.” Lastly sweet acceptance peaked over all of my foul moods.
It was when I got over myself that I was able to open up and have my God experience in the middle of my snow covered driveway. I was thinking “I’m the most ill equipped Midwesterner ever!” That is when that still small voice told me “even when you think you are ill equipped or unable to do something you can still get the job done and do it quite well. Suck it up and do it anyway.”
How many times have I told myself I would wear that dress, volunteer for that, go dancing, fix myself up, travel, etc. if only I were thin, talented, pretty, wealthy or whatever? You don’t need to improve ANYTHING to be worthy of relationships, love, respect, kindness and happiness. God has uniquely equipped you even though you believe yourself to be ill equipped. Do you have something you want to do? Then go out and do it! No one else can do what you do...so suck it up and do it ANYWAY! ;o)
